UW Bulletin Beats Ming to the Punch
Waterloo, ON - The University of Waterloo
daily bulletin beat UW student Ming Li to the punch today, posting a story about vicious geese nesting in the CPH courtyard.
"It's ludicrous," comments Ming, a student in his third year of computer science studies at the university, "I was in the library all day thinking about how I'd write the story, and they beat me to it. I knew I should have turned on my computer this morning, I could have focused all that time and energy on more productive tasks like eating and watching TV."
The daily bulletin story outlines the attack on a female student who thought she was going to bleed to death. She now realizes that the wound wasn't as serious as she thought.
The male goose was brought in for questioning yesterday by UW Police. It's long been noted for hissing and chasing after students headed for the library. No charges have been laid yet. A UW Police spokesperson said that "we are still investigating this incident, and haven't made any final decisions yet." The area around the alleged incident was still cordoned off today as police searched for more evidence.
The Geese family couldn't be reached for comments today. Some neighbours said that they probably moved to their cottage by Columbia Lake to avoid the media attention and students looking for revenge. "Good thing we're not in Louisiana," quacked one goose, "otherwise we'd all be in a bowl of gumbo now."
After a long moment of mental searching, Ming recalls seeing "a girl with a bandage on her forehead in the library today," and he suspects she may be the victim of the attack. "Well I'm glad she's back on her feet and studying again. Something like that would have traumatized me for weeks," comments Ming.
UW Police advises that students exercise caution around the Canada Geese during mating season "cause hell, you wouldn't want someone treading near you when you're trying to mate."